Saturday, July 10, 2004
Do's and Don't of "Lazy-Man" Training
The “Lazy-Man-Triathlon” has been completed. I have learned many things about myself and how I train and I feel it is imperative that I record them so I do not make the same mistakes again.
If it sounds to good to be true, it is a scam! Lazy-Man Triathlon sounded like my cup of tea. Hey, I’m as lazy as anyone I know. I’ve even watched a triathlon on TV. Nevertheless, I can’t tell you how many time I said the lord’s name in vain as I worked on finishing this miss-named event. At several points during bike rides, I elaborately planed ways to wipe the Woodbury YMCA off the face of the earth. Next year, if I find $10, I will give it to the nearest YMCA member and tell them they just dropped it.
I hate running! Although I knew I hated running before going into this, I did not truly appreciate how much. For the first week I ran about 5 miles and I repeated “I HATE RUNNING” with every step. As I got into better shape (this is of course relative) I altered my chant to “1,2,3,4,5, etc.!” When I got up to 60 I would restart. This way I knew when I had run for 30 minutes. Don’t get me wrong. I still hate running, but I just don’t start the “I HATE RUNNING!” chant until 5 hours before I run. This makes for a long night since I run at 5:30 AM.
The Rule of 15! I have developed the “Rule of 15” during a bike ride the other day. I have found, much to my dismay, I have to go back up all hills I go down. What I noticed is that I can go up hills at a speed inversely related (with regards to 15 MPH) to how fast I can go down the hills. An example, if I fly down a hill at 25 MPH (10 MPH over 15 MPH), I have found that I will go up the same hill at 5 MPH (10 MPH under 15 MPH). I have reached the speed of 30 MPH on one hill and after three tries, as my rule states, I had to call Sarah to come pick me up at the bottom. I am too scared to attempt going over 30 MPH for fear that this may adversely effect the US Stock Market.
Never, never, never give up! I have changed this Winston Churchill-ism a little to fit my predicament. Never, never, never leave for a bike ride with the wind. I guess you could call it bad luck but every bike ride I have taken I have left with the wind. I feel fresh and fast and just a little cocky. Each time I think I must finally be in shape because I feel so good. At the half way point, I turn around to find that I am being pushed along by the wind. Nothing is more demoralizing than trying to bike against the wind except maybe biking against the wind when you are 15 miles from home, tired, out of water, and your butt hurts.
Stop and smell the roses! It is true that if you slow down you can notice so much more about what is around you. Instead of driving everywhere; riding your bike, walking, or even running opens your eyes to what would normally fly by the car window without a second thought. Like; listening to the sound of the wind pass through a cornfield, seeing the beauty of the sun breaking through the clouds for the first time that day, smelling the road kill that was thrown into the ditch last week.
Triathlons are bias against swimmers! Swimmers are at huge disadvantage in triathlons. I have prorated three different triathlons based on my speeds and time it would take me to complete each event: Run (12 minute miles), Bike (12 MPH), and Swim (4000 yards per hour).
I’m sorry, but this “Lazy-Man” wants the choice next year and I don’t think even biking against the wind will keep me from doing 13.2 miles!
If it sounds to good to be true, it is a scam! Lazy-Man Triathlon sounded like my cup of tea. Hey, I’m as lazy as anyone I know. I’ve even watched a triathlon on TV. Nevertheless, I can’t tell you how many time I said the lord’s name in vain as I worked on finishing this miss-named event. At several points during bike rides, I elaborately planed ways to wipe the Woodbury YMCA off the face of the earth. Next year, if I find $10, I will give it to the nearest YMCA member and tell them they just dropped it.
I hate running! Although I knew I hated running before going into this, I did not truly appreciate how much. For the first week I ran about 5 miles and I repeated “I HATE RUNNING” with every step. As I got into better shape (this is of course relative) I altered my chant to “1,2,3,4,5, etc.!” When I got up to 60 I would restart. This way I knew when I had run for 30 minutes. Don’t get me wrong. I still hate running, but I just don’t start the “I HATE RUNNING!” chant until 5 hours before I run. This makes for a long night since I run at 5:30 AM.
The Rule of 15! I have developed the “Rule of 15” during a bike ride the other day. I have found, much to my dismay, I have to go back up all hills I go down. What I noticed is that I can go up hills at a speed inversely related (with regards to 15 MPH) to how fast I can go down the hills. An example, if I fly down a hill at 25 MPH (10 MPH over 15 MPH), I have found that I will go up the same hill at 5 MPH (10 MPH under 15 MPH). I have reached the speed of 30 MPH on one hill and after three tries, as my rule states, I had to call Sarah to come pick me up at the bottom. I am too scared to attempt going over 30 MPH for fear that this may adversely effect the US Stock Market.
Never, never, never give up! I have changed this Winston Churchill-ism a little to fit my predicament. Never, never, never leave for a bike ride with the wind. I guess you could call it bad luck but every bike ride I have taken I have left with the wind. I feel fresh and fast and just a little cocky. Each time I think I must finally be in shape because I feel so good. At the half way point, I turn around to find that I am being pushed along by the wind. Nothing is more demoralizing than trying to bike against the wind except maybe biking against the wind when you are 15 miles from home, tired, out of water, and your butt hurts.
Stop and smell the roses! It is true that if you slow down you can notice so much more about what is around you. Instead of driving everywhere; riding your bike, walking, or even running opens your eyes to what would normally fly by the car window without a second thought. Like; listening to the sound of the wind pass through a cornfield, seeing the beauty of the sun breaking through the clouds for the first time that day, smelling the road kill that was thrown into the ditch last week.
Triathlons are bias against swimmers! Swimmers are at huge disadvantage in triathlons. I have prorated three different triathlons based on my speeds and time it would take me to complete each event: Run (12 minute miles), Bike (12 MPH), and Swim (4000 yards per hour).
Running as a gage
Run: 26.2 miles
Bike: 62.4 miles
Swim: 12.2 miles
Biking as a gage
Bike: 112.0 miles
Run: 48.3 miles
Swim: 21.3 miles
Swimming as a gage
Swim: 2.5 miles
Bike: 13.2 miles
Run: 5.5 miles
I’m sorry, but this “Lazy-Man” wants the choice next year and I don’t think even biking against the wind will keep me from doing 13.2 miles!
